Sometimes I ask myself what is the purpose of it all. What are we all doing this for? Are we randomly passing time, or is there a true underlying intention for our actions and are placement amongst people and time. Coming from the school of thought of "everything happens for a reason" life has inevitably become one big episode of "Heroes"...one where the episodes are more resonant and better written of course (all without the use of special effects). The funny thing about intention and purpose is that we often don't even know that we are engaging in such while its happening. Whose to say that a random conversation at the bus stop or in a grocery store, at the gym, or in an elevator doesn't have a vast impact on the outcome on ones day. And who is to say that your mere presence can bring a sense of calm to the storm that may be someone life at the time.
Last night I found myself in the emergency room at a LA hospital waiting on the prognosis of a good friend who had checked in from stomach pain. Of course, my mind was racing from worry and concern but brewing just under the surface was a situation involving a family that had just simultaneously checked in a family member. There scenario more dire, a young woman had passed out in her home and the family members could not wake her up. I could see from the disheveled faces and pacing back and forth from the two dozen or so that had conveyed outside the hospital in support that hope was in short order. By the time I got to the hospital and sat in the waiting station of emergency, I was to learn that the young woman's son was denied entrance to see his dying mother and that she had inevitably passed. Being no stranger to moments like these, I quietly help my head down and said a prayer as the screams and wails of grief passed over my head like bottle rockets, with those outside coming in to comfort those who were still inside. Me and the few who had convened for my good friend stood motionless almost standing helpless as we watched the scene unfold. Mothers grabbing their young and embracing in sobs and yells, apologizing as we try to comfort them the best way we knew how. All I kept thinking was how bad I felt for this family, the son who could not see his mother - to say his last words, and my friend who we could not see - wishing and hoping myself for the best for all that stood in the room.
Even more worried about my friend now, the sobbing seized momentarily as the family members, as best they could, grabbed their composure and made there way outside changing the mood momentarily as two new individuals popped up who at first I assumed were part of the other party. He looked like he just got into a fight and she, looked like a nursing assistant. They, just as perplexed at the scenario as us, so after making small talk and filling them on the facts that had just gone down, we were to learn that the dude had got into a fight with his sisters boyfriend who had just been released from the pen and who tried to molest a younger family member. The bit of comedy, if you can believe it, is that the dude had been bit on the upper, inner thigh during the fight and was at the hospital for a tetanus shot. Now imagine seeing people screaming and yelling for their loss and then moments later, a dude comes in and pulls down his pants to show everyone in the lobby a bite mark he just received near his crotch from a fight....it gets better.
Me and the homies, at this point, had a bit of fun pointing out the inadequecies of the hosptial staff (ohh, in the middle of the hail storm the two dude at reception had food delivered and took off without a care in the world) and the probability or reason for a grown man who was twice as big as the guy sitting in the lobby suffering scratches, biting another due on his inner thigh. We chatted it up for a while as we all looked at the clock still awaiting a diagnosis. On and off we can hear quiet wells from outside and grieving family members pass the door when a group of three; a mother, pergnant daughter, and boyfriend stroll through the door and can't find anyone to help them. At this point, the homie jumped up and instructed one of the security guards to get the reception dudes so that they can help this woman as the woman (the mother) is shouting profanities over not having anyone to help her. She is sobbing, but lucid and explains quite gently that her niece had just passed away moments before as her daughter sat beside us experiencing labor pains. Same hospital, a life taken and a life delivered all from the same family within moments of one another....and I was floored. We told the woman all we knew of the situation and then try as best we could to change the mood from sadness to hapiness that new life was entering the world. The girl looked about 16 years old and her boyfriend prolly the same age. All I kept thinking was the fact that, being so young, at least homie was there to see about his son or daughter. Funny where the mind trails off.
It wasn't too long after this that my friend was released in a happy homecoming of warm faces and the sound of relief as she appeared to be just fine. After a round of hugs and small talk, we bid our new friends adeau (the guy with the scratches and his girlfriend who we later learned was two months pregnant) in a moment that seem like it came right out of the Johnson family reunion. Its funny how human connection works cause in that moment, we were no longer at a hospital, but in a place where we all felt connected and bonded by the experiences we had just gone through.
Leaving the hospital, my mind was thankful that my friend was alright but of course I had to say another prayer for the families loss, but smiled at the thought of life just as easily being brought to them. And then it hit me....life is such a dictotomy...an ebb and flow of conflicting forces that sometimes gell together in a way to make something completly flawed and beautiful. As much as we complain about whats not going right...sometimes there is a purpose and explanation for it that cannot be foreseen at the time. Sorta like being in an emergecny room and comforting a family you don't know...making small talk with folks you befriend at the moment, and waiting for your friend to come home in one piece. The whole thing inevitably impacted me in such a way that it inspired me to write again, about the human condition. It also made me understand that we as humans are far more resilient than we know...even in our most trying and telling times......that life is a gift, that you cherish that gift....and you don't take it for granted because you never know when a moment will be your last....and somone else's new beginning.
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